In just over 2 years I have managed to transform my life from a place of darkness to a sanctuary of light. A world of vicious circles and damaging behaviour which fed my depression and anxiety to a world where only peace, love of self and passion for life now exists.
If someone had said to me two years ago that I would eventually recover from my depression, make peace and sense of my past experiences and own my own holistic business, I would have asked what they had been drinking and ordered a pint or two for myself! The person who looks back at me in the mirror today is unrecognisable when compared to the person I once was and this is the fundamental reason for the birth of Inner-Wisdom Holistic Training Academy.
The most significant challenge in my life has been depression and anxiety and I started with this at the young age of 16. Depression affected every bit of my essence and every aspect of my life. Depression for me was a monster that resided deep inside my mind. A monster that hitched a free ride through my bloodstream leaving aches and pains in its wake. A monster that tormented me through the hours of darkness and took away my basic human functions through the hours of light.
This monster within governed my every thought and emotion and very rarely rewarded me with moments of joy or of pleasure. It sabotaged my dreams and my relationships, convinced me I was hated by the masses and stripped me of all self-confidence and self-worth. It twisted my stomach muscles, distorted my reflection in the mirror and ridiculed my every attempt to free myself. The monster within grew immune to medications, medical interventions and attempts at self-help. It grew so powerful that it became my identity. It never faded and never ceased to exist. It became my way of life, my way of thinking and my way of being. It fed of the drama and vicious circles and encouraged my failings, the twists and the turns, the doubt and the self-pity. It became my blanket at night and my sunglasses through the day. It became the wall I built around my heart and the reason behind every missed opportunity.
I was numb and merely existing. I appeared normal on the outside but on the inside I was broken. Fake smiles masked the pain, alcohol numbed the emotion and my career disguised my innermost demons. Until May of 2017, around the time of my 38th Birthday, when I found myself in a hotel bar chatting to a lovely couple from Amsterdam. It was raining out so the majority of the resort were in the bar making the most of the 'all-inclusive' drinks. I got to know this couple well and as a birthday gift they bought me a voucher for reflexology which I later had in resort. It was during this treatment that I was asked if I had ever had reiki (which I hadn't) and when I asked why, she explained that she sensed a lot of sadness inside of me which Reiki would help with. I was intrigued and upon my return to the UK I booked a reiki session with a local practitioner.
It was the strangest yet most exhilarating experience of my life. I felt so relaxed and peaceful inside which was a strange feeling for me as I was usually wired and anxious. I continued with reiki and in the space of just four weeks the monster within started to shrink. It seemed less confident in its ability to control me, it disturbed me less at night and only hung around until mid morning during the hours of light. In what seemed like the blink of an eye, the tables were definitely turning and I had a new found curiosity for life and holistic well-being.
In the winter months of 2017 I enrolled at the Holistic Healing College in London and embarked on my Spiritual Life Coaching Certificate. It was during this 12 month period that my journey to self really unfolded and I developed a friendship with the monster within that eventually set me free from what I came to recognise as a shadow aspect of myself. The monster within was in fact me in energetic form and a collective of all my negative experiences in this lifetime which I nurtured into the monster I could not free myself from, until now.
The journey was by no means easy but my word, was it worth its weight in gold! For the first time ever I journeyed within. I lifted the lid on that monster inside and I dissected every inch, every nook and every cranny, until I surfaced one day as myself. A person I adored but had never known, a person who waited patiently inside to be found. I trudged through my own murky waters and forgave past experiences and behaviours of myself and others. I cried buckets of tears and spent time in isolation, connected with lost parts of my soul and gave birth to aspects of myself I didn't know existed. I ventured into past lives and soul contracts prior to incarnation. I rode the waves of emotion and surfed the tides of old wounds and simply allowed the process of healing. I pursued reiki, crystal healing and angelic reiki unearthing the unseen keys to wisdom and connecting with the highest levels of healing energy. I spent a total of 18-mths inside a galactic washing machine which cleansed my soul, removed old stains, replenished my energy and delicately returned me to a wonderful state of being.
Energy really is the key to healing the whole person and I cannot stress enough the importance of our energetic selves, each and every one of us, at soul level. Physical 'dis-ease' occurs due to energetic imbalances which when left untreated can be catastrophic for the physical body. I realise now that I was so blocked on an energetic level I had no hope whatsoever of healing myself on a physical level. From my own experiences and physical issues that I have faced throughout my lifetime I have learnt a lot about energy and how it impacts our physical self.
My journey with holistic therapies has allowed me to understand myself on an energetic level and subsequently process all my experiences and emotions. This allowed me to unblock my energy centres (chakras) to create flow in the universal life force energy within me, thus healing my physical body and ultimately freeing me from the monster within, my shadow self. The monster within that once tortured me on a daily basis was tamed once and for all. I have also learned that modern day medicine and prescription drugs do not treat the underlying cause, do not work on the energetic (whole) self and therefore act merely as a plaster.
Holistic therapies changed my life in an unimaginable way. They lifted the dark cloud and removed the fog that once greeted me every morning, they empowered me to make positive changes in my life and recognise my own unique gifts. Holistic therapies raised my vibration, allowed me to connect with my highest self, opened gateways to unimaginable knowledge that I once only read in the pages of books. Holistic practices allowed me to take care of myself and grow from strength to strength, they put a smile on my face, a spring in my step and paved the way for the wonderful life I live today.
My life is unrecognisable in just 2 years and I am so passionate about my own journey and the benefits of holistic therapies that I want to share it with as many people as possible. Inner-Wisdom Holistic Training Academy is more than just a holistic business. It is an extension of my very essence, a place for self-discovery and self-healing. It is a space where every soul is welcome, a centre for sharing knowledge and healing modalities to support others on their own unique journey. It is a school for the soul, a shoulder to cry on when times are hard and a place to share tears of joy and of laughter. Inner-Wisdom Holistic Training Academy is my heart centre where all I am, all I have ever been and all I am yet to become can unfold. It is a symbol of hope and of recovery, it is a place of inspiration for struggles overcome and a hub for each and everyone of you to visit in times of need or in times of expansion and self-development.
My mission statement is therefore;
To empower and connect the hearts of many to the universal life force energy that flows through all; by remaining transparent and joyful in the sharing of my own unique journey and providing unconditional; love, kindness and support to all who seek it.
I hope to see you all soon - Jo x